Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
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