Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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