i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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