So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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