Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
