Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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