She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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