Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
