I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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