Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
