i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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