Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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