I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize