kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
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