Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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