Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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