how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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