my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
