Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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