I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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