Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize