How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
im holly from the hills drunk
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Randomize
