no you cant smoke seaweed
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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