I can tuck mytits in my pants
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
