at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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