i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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