so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
