would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
