Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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