So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
