You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Randomize
