:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
This is my gift to your gina
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
