People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
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