It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
