in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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