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How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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