Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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