guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
