i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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