Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I just googled if crying burns calories
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
