So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
