oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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