Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Randomize
