everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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