GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
