thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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