Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Randomize
