You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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