Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
