Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize